I’ve been away from this blog for a while. Partially because I landed in San Francisco on September 20, 2013 and, since the theme of this section of the blog has been “Ellie’s Bicycle Journey,” I’ve felt that I need to fit any content I put up here in that framework. As a result, I’ve held back my tangential and unrelated meanderings because they’re either not about a bicycle or because I’m afraid of voicing my private thoughts about things like the construction/understanding of meaning, self-identity and discovery (and the presentation or ‘branding’ of self that comes along with that), indigenous rights and my relationship to that as a White American Woman, frustrating associations of money with success, and other thoughts such as these. I’m done, though, hesitating to write my thoughts because ‘people just want to see pictures’ or because ‘that’s not relevant here.’ I’ve been terrified of what the vast and timeless Interwebs (made of people) will think of my personal thoughts, and while I’ll remain careful and rather deliberate with what I post, I will be less scared of external judgment.
So as I work to move past these fears, the thoughts and findings posted are the continuation of my journey. Right now it is cathartic to write freely, and I do not live in a place that tightly monitors my words and my thoughts in a way that is presently used against me. I have learned the consequence and sensitivities of word choice in a country where each expressed idea has serious implications, and I believe that is one reason why I am slower to express my own. But I want to use this page now to express the continuation of “Ellie’s Bicycle Journey,” even if it’s not in the form of bike travel day in and day out. I do promise, however, that the ideas can all start and end with the concept of a bicycle. At least subtly.
By that I mean- I continue to ride my bike almost daily in San Francisco in commuter form, and my mind tends to wander well when I catch my breath that little bit more deeply on a ride. So the thoughts I express on this blog will now be expanded to encompass “Things Ellie Thinks About On A Bicycle.” In other words, I can write basically anything I want on this blog and attribute it to something I thought of while riding my bicycle. (Kinda like Einstein and his Theory of Relativity, which he claims he thought of when he was riding his bicycle)
It won’t be fully representative because I don’t know how to post purely blank space on here. Man, I love those brilliantly meditative rides where all thoughts are subdued! Who’s with me on that??
So anyway, you’ll see the rides here where thoughts race with such inspiration (or confusion) that I can’t keep my fingers off the keyboard. I’m going to try to stop fighting that urge.
So hello again, blogosphere!